Seven Signs That You Forgot Secretary's Day!

1. Phone messages delivered on the end of a spear.

2. Your important dictation somehow comes out reading: "I am a slave-driving miser"

3. It's not so much the cold coffee, it's the staples at the bottom of the cup.

4. Your big business dinner at the Four Seasons Restaurant in Manhattan is rescheduled for Big Jeb's 24 -Hour Truck Stop outside of Newark, New Jersey.

5. Now answers the phone, "Smith, Jones and Tightwad."

6. That New York to Los Angeles trip booked for you now involves six plane changes, a 12 hour layover in Guam and a personal appearance on Ricki Lake's "I'm A Selfish Pig" episode.

7. You find you've been scheduled to speak at the National Silly Puddy Convention.

Secretary's Thoughts: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.

~ Author unknown, but probably a secretary ~

Office Workers' Old Addage

Accomplishing the impossible means only that the boss will add it to your regular duties.

Time is an illusion, lunch time doubly so.